Graduation is 32 days away. I have not applied to grad school. I have no jobs lined up. I still work part-time as a waitress at a mediocre restaurant. Oh, and I graduate next month. I’m just silently freaking out on the inside. I know things will be okay. I must continue to reassure myself. I do have to take action though. I can’t allow time to pass by without setting the goals I want for myself. It will not be easy, but it will be worth it. Nonetheless, I am proud of myself thus far. I started college straight out of high school and kept pushing forward. Now, here I am so close to that diploma. This will be a major achievement for myself and that alone makes me happy. It will be a challenge in choosing my next direction, but with my continued effort and perseverance, I have this in the bag.
The greatest love of all.
I have learned (and continue to learn) what it means to love SELF. With that knowledge, I have learned what it means to love another. I love myself, and I try to accept every piece of myself, everyday. Love is about acceptance. I am no perfect being, but I strive to be the best ME that I can be. Along my journey, I have realized that those who do not accept themselves, have a hard time loving, period. They can’t love themselves, which in turn makes it difficult to truly love another. I have been there and plan to never go back.
Another important lesson I have learned about love, is that love is KIND and kindness starts with the way we treat ourselves. How we treat others, is only a reflection of how we feel about ourselves. I have experienced both friendships and relationships where I was treated poorly because of how those individuals felt about themselves. Because I love myself, I chose to remove myself from those relationships. Like I said, love is kindness and for someone to treat you other than kind only is a reflection of self.
Within the last couple of years, I have been so blessed to experience one of the healthiest relationships one could ever experience. My relationship is a reflection of myself and of my boyfriend. Our relationship is secure because we as individuals are secure. Jealousy has no home in a place where security thrives (realest thing I have ever come up with).
I firmly believe that my relationship is healthy because of the love I have for myself, and because of the love my boyfriend has for his self. Love of self allows us to love in a way that some may never experience because of lack of self love. Self love is so powerful, you have to feel it to believe it! Our relationship is healthy, but do not confuse that with perfection. In my eyes, my relationship is greatness, pretty much perfect. However, perfection is perception. I perceive my relationship to be just that. Occasionally, I fight with my significant other, but we always communicate and forgive one another (forgiveness is key). We learn from our disagreements and we GROW. Love is about growth, and I TELL YA, WE ARE GROWING! I am so happy and excited about all of the growth that is happening, and that will continue to happen. I am not about depending on another individual for my own happiness, because NEWS FLASH, if ya did not know already, YOU provide your own happiness, but it is pretty fantastic to share happiness with someone else. I mean, honestly, that is probably one of the greatest feelings in this world.
Forever grateful
Although we have a day that is solely dedicated to giving thanks, we all know we shouldn’t wait for this one day to show our appreciation to the ones we love. Everyday should be seized as opportunity to show those important to us how important they truly are. Everyday I think of why I am grateful for you. I think of a life without you, and I have no idea what that looks like. I mean, without you, I would be here, living, but really, without you, I couldn’t continue to grow in the way that I have the past two years. Sure, we can live without one another, but that would really suck. I am my own person and you are your own person, but somehow we have managed to intertwine and grow as a unit. I am forever grateful to have met you. I am forever grateful to have gotten to know you in the way that I have. I am forever grateful to be impacted by your existence. I love you and I want you in my life, always.
You can literally do ANYTHING you want to do as long as you BELIEVE in yourself. If it is something you really want for yourself, you can achieve it. With hard work and effort, you can be one step closer to your goal. It will not come to you EASY. That is why it is a challenge. You must ask yourself, “How bad do I want this? Am I willing to work?”
Fight the urge of being average. 